Monday, August 23, 2010

And more good news!

Sorry, that was sarcastic.  We had a rough few weeks at Casa De Coley.

Just when financially we were starting to make some progress, and I could almost see us buying a home, we got a one-two knockout combo. First: A credit check uncovered the fact that Xtian's mother (she of the crazy) has been stealing Xtian's identity, running up phone and power bills  and never paying them. When they cut her off, she moves, and opens new ones using his name and Social Security number. The cycle has been going on for at least four years. So, that SUCKS! And they are still trying to hold us responsible for the unpaid bills. The worst part, however, is the emotional toll it's taking on Xtian. I'll get more into that later. The second hit: less than 24 hours after discovering exactly the depths of his mom's depravity, Xtian was let go from his job. Yay.

Between those two events, Xtian is shell shocked. He's known his mother is mentally ill, and goes to great lengths to keep up her skewed version of events and the world. He knows she is destructive, hurtful and awful. But this crossed a line. This has actual real-life non-emotional consequences. This could keep Xtian from owning a home ever. This is actual crime committed against your own child. Can you even imagine? It's absolutely enraging for
me. I want that woman to suffer, I'm so angry at her... how do you do
that to your own kid? How?

And then you get let go from a job you really liked, that paid well, and where they really liked you. Just a bit too much for one man.

Now financially, we'll be ok. A week after he lost his job, I got a pretty big pay increase, enough to cover our bills. But not enough to get us moving forward again. But between the raise and some unemployment, we shouldn't lose much ground.
And if there is a silver lining to discovering your mother has been stealing your identity and screwing your credit up ridiculously, then it would be this: at least this can be the final straw for him. He can finally feel like he's free to break off all contact, without guilt. It's not him, it is her. He has felt guilty over the godawful mess his mother is for years, but this is unforgiveable. Or so he says.

Mostly, I'm impressed that he managed to file a police report. That couldn't have been easy for him, but he did it.

So, that's what's going on with us. Hooray.


cassee01 said...

That does suck all around. Glad you are not going backward tho!

jen breese said...

Huge hugs.

Faith said...

OMG! Coley, I'm so sorry!

She really needs to get put away, either in jail or in an institution of some sort, to keep her from doing this sort of thing to people. Wow.