Friday, April 4, 2008

Fondly remembering hysteria

So, I was talking to my big sister the other night, and she reminded me of a conversation we'd had when Warren was only a few weeks old. I don't quite remember the details, but Warren was behaving like a baby, and I made the comment, "You know, I don't condone it or anything, but THIS is why people shake babies." And it was nice to be reminded how difficult the first several weeks with a baby were, when compared to how nicely things have been lately. The kiddo has been here for 15 weeks, and frankly, I'm afraid to talk about how easy he is. I don't know how I got to be so lucky, and I'm sure I'm just setting myself up for a really hard toddlerhood, or adolescence, but seriously, this kid is awesome. I can't remember the last time he full on CRIED. He fusses for a few minutes if I'm slow to feed him, and he gets a little whiny when he's overly tired. But other than that he smiles, and coos and makes happy shrieking sounds all the time. Seriously...ALL THE TIME.

Not to say there weren't hard times. I remember the day he screamed at me for 6 hours straight. He didn't sleep, he didn't want to eat. He screamed. At one point, about 2 hours in, all I could do, was put him in his bed, walk out of the room, walk out the front door, call Xtian and cry, "I'm going to murder your son." But, no one else was there. So, I yelled and sobbed at Xtian for a few minutes, then screamed into a pillow for a few more, then turned around, and picked up the screaming demon. And listened to him scream for a few more hours. I wholly believe that if we weren't biologically programmed to find our kids cute, no one would ever make it past 4 weeks of age.

But, I can't really complain. We've been so fortunate to avoid some of the biggest issues, no colic, no food sensitivities, no real sleep problems. And there were still days I had to practice my deep breathing so I wouldn't lose my shit. I have no idea how single parents do this. What do you do when there's no one to take the kid when you've finally reached your limit? And don't even get me started on kids who DO have colic, or sleep issues, or any of the myriad things that make this parenting business torture. Hats off to you all. No joke.

I got my first Shitty Parent Comment the other day. I'd heard that this stuff happens, but I'd not experienced it. People with kids will know what I mean. Another parent starts up a conversation then lays a nice backhanded compliment on you, or makes a thinly veiled judgmental comment about your kid/parenting. This one wasn't bad, but it had the edge of "Well, MY kid is better than yours." I was so unprepared, I didn't realize what she was saying until she was gone. Then I wanted to hunt her down, and rip every hair off her head. I'm going to be the terror of the playground, I can see it. Why can't we all just play nice?

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