Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Of Fat Feet and Cruel Overlords

So, with the increasing heat and my forever expanding body my feet have been swelling. And I don’t mean a little puffiness. I mean, I officially have CANKLES! I wake up in the morning with slightly puffy feet, and by 9 am, we’re looking at Flintstones feet.

As every woman in the world can tell you, what are you supposed to do when you have water retention/swelling? Say it with me now, drink lots of water, and avoid salt like the plague! I’m kicking ass on the drinking water thing. But, the problem is salt.
Nothing tastes right anymore. Nothing except salt. I had a delightful, perfectly seasoned steak with orzo salad for dinner last night. At least, it used to taste perfect. Last night, each bite demanded another shake of the saltshaker. Thinking that was pretty gross, I was further disgusted to find myself thinking that the cookie dough I ate later (shut up, don’t you judge me!) needed more salt. Right now, I’m thinking about salting my granola bar. Seriously. So, my own body has decided that feet so swollen you can’t flex your ankle are the best thing ever. I need a nap.


So, did you hear some states are trying to make it possible to sue your boss for being mean?
Reading that article immediately evoked memories of my last job in Milwaukee. It was a really small, web based company where the creator of the site also filled the roles of manager, HR, and small time coke head.
So, a quick email to my old coworker, and we ended up swapping stories. Some were so amazing, I have to share, but all names have been changed to protect the victims.

My personal annoyances with this boss were the standard being made to use my vacation time when I had to have some surgery on my foot, and providing a doctor’s note. Being shrieked at when I accidentally used the wrong link on our website my first day doing any web editing. The problem was fixed within 4 minutes, but that didn’t stop the 25-minute tirade, no exaggeration. Taking 5 sick days in 8 months, and being called into his office to explain myself, regardless of the fact no sick time policy had been violated.

This guy was like an abusive boyfriend. He’d abuse everyone one staff, verbally and publicly for a week, then when everyone was just getting to mutinous rage, he’d take everyone out for drinks. “Baby, you know I don’t like to hurt you. But you just make me so mad! Here, have some jewelry. I don’t know what I’d do if you ever left me…”

So, a couple of the stories that were relayed back to me are as follows:

“I went into his office in tears one morning apologizing for the short notice but my cousin had died in a car accident over the weekend and I would need to go to Michigan for a few days. He said he was sorry for my loss and then said it would not be a problem, but since my cousin was not an immediate family member I would have to use my vacation days. The bereavement policy only offered two days for an immediate family member.”
(Please note: the bereavement policy that the boss himself wrote!)

“The IT guy, had a kid diagnosed with juvenile diabetes and had to go to a lot of appointments at Children's Hospital. The boss was disgusted and I believe expressed to another coworker ‘I don't know what the big deal is. It's JUST diabetes!’”

So, in honor of that crackpot of an asshole boss, I will open up the comments to those who wish to share the heinous actions of bosses/former bosses. Pseudonyms encouraged.

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