Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Warning: Softball rant ahoy!

I’m having a day where the clock isn’t moving. I’m a little cranky, so forgive the ranting tone of this.

All I want to do is go home today. And normally, I’d be in the home stretch. But today there MIGHT be softball practice. I use the term “practice” loosely because this will not be a practice wherein anyone will learn anything. Nor will anyone’s play improve based on the activities of today. No.

I’ve discovered something about a certain breed of men: they don’t know how to teach anything. Softball is a brain game. You always have a job to do. No one on our team knows what their job is. Every crack of the bat, we’ve got 9 people running around looking like retards trying to hump doorknobs.

“Ah!” You might think, “then wouldn’t more practice solve this problem?” A fair question. But, if you just keep hitting balls at people, and never explain and demonstrate how the play SHOULD go down, how will they figure it out? They won’t. And said doorknob humping ensues. I know plenty of glorious drills to run for our team to help us understand play, and teamwork. But, any attempts at guidance have been deterred. The MEN know how to do it better!

Except the men think we lost our first game because we ONLY scored 6 runs. Whereas, I’m 99% sure we lost our first game because we allowed an embarrassing 12 runs to score. If we can’t protect against a single hit, we can CRUSH the ball during our ups and it will never give us a decent winning record. That’s the difference between men who know how to teach, and men who don’t. Men who don’t just say, “Hit the ball!” Instead of giving actual help. If you just tell your pitcher to “throw strikes” you’re not really helping them figure out HOW to throw strikes. As though they weren’t aware that their job is to throw strikes, like the batter’s job is to hit the ball. Duh, we know that. Now show me HOW to do that.

An example: C, one of the female VPs on the team, is playing second base. I’m playing first base. She’s hit a ground ball. She tries to grab it from the side without bending her knees, and completely misses the ball. The man running the practice, another VP, just tells her to “keep trying.” Well, obviously, she keeps missing the ball.

I took five seconds and told her, “C, try to square up in front of the ball, like this, bend your knees and stay in front of the ball.” What do you know, she’s been fielding like a pro ever since.

Unfortunately, I'm not running the practices. The MEN are. And the MEN don't know shit about coaching, so no one takes the time with the players, and no one improves.

So, I’ll stay more than an hour late, only to spend two hours in frustrating “practice” before going home to my snuggly husband and getting to eat. Again. Goddamnit!

Sorry about the softball rant.

I’m ready to kill Aaron, the older disabled man I supervise. Lately I’ve suspected he’s shirking his job. And then I got proof. He was supposed to stuff some marketing pieces into “freebie” bags. The same way he’s done it for the last 15 years. I count out the bags for him, and he does the rest. Only, he’s taking huge chunks of what I count out, and hiding them. I busted him on it, and he pretends he has no idea what I’m talking about. But he does. This has been going on all week, but I can’t yell at him, because then I’m the asshole yelling at the special guy. Really, I think a good smack in the face might help “remind him” of how to do his job.

I think I’m not exactly fit for human company tonight. Dude, maybe I’ll just blow off practice…gah, but then I’m part of the problem. And I hate people who never show up for practice but STILL play (and suck) in the games.

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