Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Dear Warren,

Stop being an ass. Night time is for sleep.
Remember when you were a sweet, tiny little 8 week old? And you slept through the night, every night, for weeks on end? Well, I remember it. And I have to say, I think I liked you better then.
Oh sure, it's gratifying to hear you call me "Mama" and really cute the way you move around and dance and sing and make funny faces and sounds. But I really like to sleep.

So, how about you stop this whole "waking up and trying to play for hours on end every goddamn night making your parents have total emotional meltdowns in the middle of the night" thing. Ok?

Mama loves you, but if she doesn't get two uninterrupted hours of sleep soon, she just might leave you behind when we move.

Love,
Mama.

2 comments:

april said...

They're so fun, aren't they? Sometimes, I think there's those whole baby conspiracy thing that runs until they turn like 20. Part of the conspiracy is that they do things intentionally to piss you the fuck off. I know there's certain thing mine does at the age of 10 and I'm just like, "What the fuck where you thinking? Why would you do that? Do you hate me?"

Wish I could tell you it gets better, but it doesn't. It does get different, but not better.

Too bad they're so damn cute, ya know?

Coley said...

EXACTLY! Xtian was actually lamenting that Warren is too cute to stay mad at. And he wanted to be pissed still. But then Warren looks at you and gives you a gummy grin, and you can't help but smile and kiss him to death. Stupid cute, infuriating babies!