Thursday, December 13, 2007

Aw, Crap.

I figured I'd better write something in a calm moment, lest you all think I'd gone off the deep end.
So another week, another doctor's appointment. And virtually no progress was made in that week. If labor doesn't start by my next appointment, we'll have to induce.

I'm not thrilled about the plan, since once you have to artificially do anything with labor, it pretty much guarantees you won't get through delivery without pain meds and other interventions. Which is so not the way I was hoping to do this. And if one person points out "Well, at least it'll be a healthy baby at the end of everything" I will lose it completely. Right now, I'm not really able to focus on the positive, and if you try to make me, I'm going to turn all my frustration and anger on you. Just a fair warning.

I keep hoping this little bastard will take the looming induction as a threat and get things going already. During my nap this morning, I dreamed that I had the baby, and forgot to tell Xtian about it. Weird. And boring. Sorry.

Yesterday, after my appointment, I was a mess. Now, I think more than anything, I'm just resigned. There isn't much I can do about it, and at the very least, that kid will be here within 8 days. And I'll have burned 4 weeks of maternity leave, which means I'll have to put an 8 week old infant into day care when I go back to work. That feels good. Oh wait, no it doesn't.
Next time I do this, I'm working until the head is out.

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