Thursday, September 1, 2005

*ahem* Eyes above my neckline please. You know, they don't grown when you talk to them.

So, how's it going? I've been bailing out of all my social outings this week. I'm exhausted. I just can't seem to get the energy to do anything beyond getting out of bed. I'm not bummed or anything, just freaking wrung out.

So I have to hand it to Xtian. That man has infinite patience. I'm not an easy person to live with (*gasp* I know, you all thought I was soooo mild-mannered and sane) as it turns out. I have daily panic attacks that my house is "filthy," that I'm fat, that I'm broke and that I'll never have children. Add that to the fact that I'm sarcastic to a fault, and Xtian is still having trouble determining whether I'm joking or just evil. That's just the standard "had a pretty good day" stuff. Then you throw in periodic full-on Freak-The-FUCK-Out's, my whiny "why does everything hate me" days, and my need to rant about any topic, political or otherwise.

And yet, he still likes me. And still "can't believe" that I put up with him?!?!?! The thought had crossed my mind that he's actually mentally ill. I'm still exploring this theory, I'll get back to you when I have more evidence.
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Ok, totally a TMI kind of thing, but I must share it.

A few weeks ago, Xtian and I got a little tipsy and silly and he ended up doing a strip tease to a song by Lil Jon (If you don't know who Lil Jon is, no worries, some random hip hop guy with really high energy songs). Anyhow, I often listen to music at work, and today, that song came on 4 times. Everytime it came on, I get visibly flushed. And of course it's only at these times that my boss stops by. Awesome. I look like a spaz. Of course, I am a spaz.

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So, in the What the Fuck? section for the day...

I had my One-on-one meeting with new boss the other day. I think it went well, I was honest about my career goals and what I do on the team. So, I left feeling pretty good about things. Could this be just another carrot being held out to me, only to have it never materialize? Of course. But at least it's something to look forward to.

Anyhow, that's just backstory. So, half of my coworkers have approached me in the last couple days to "check in" with my about my meeting with new lady boss. I tell them it went well, and they get all parental on me. MS saying things like "I hope you were honest about your qualifications, and where you want to be going. I know your job is not challenging and you'd like to get out of it." That's the general sentiment I'm getting from people.

Here's the thing. If they are soooo concerned about my career satisfaction, and they are aware that I hate doing all the "admin" type things, why are they the ones who have me do all the admin things?

Seriously. Apparently hipocrisy is very in right now. Who knew?

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Anyone else find it rather irritating that Bush "cut his vacation short" in order to "tour the hurricane devastated" areas? This was announced yesterday. What asshole president went on, and stayed on vacation while whole counties were wiped out? Oh, he's missing a whole two days of vacation? Wow, where does the self-sacrifice end? (Note: Sarcasm)

Sorry, ranting on this subject is done.
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So, just when I'm feeling kind of fat and gross...

I'm walking down the hallway in my office suite, when this tall, youngish consultant almost falls out of his chair looking at me. I'd never seen him before, but he's talking with my teammates, so I assume he works in my group. As soon as I'm sitting at my desk, he's standing there introducing himself and smiling at me. Was he asking me to do something admin-like? Yes. But was he obviously checking out my rack? Yes he was. Where are we in life where being objectified is the best part of my day?


Right. I'm out of here. Perhaps more tomorrow, we'll see how motivated I am.

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