2

My little guy turns two years old today. It feels like forever, and also the blink of an eye.

So, forgive me a little mama moment.

This kid just kills me. I miss him when he takes a long nap. I can't wait to see his sunny little face when I get home from work. I'm just madly in love with his funny little self. It is utterly incredible to see so much of myself and so much of Xtian in him. I completely melt when he takes me by the hand, leads me to the couch and a cuddly blanket so we can snuggle and read one of his books. He will go to enormous lengths to make you laugh, the salad spinner on his head is a particularly big crowd pleaser. I love how overjoyed he is when he figures something out, jumping up and down, clapping and shouting "YAY!"

Lately we've been spending a lot of time with the new babies of my friends. Watching him kiss the babies, and try to hug the babies is unbelievably sweet. I cannot wait to see him grow into his role as a big brother. But I will admit, I am worried about having to take time and attention away from him when the new baby arrives. He's only recently started to prefer spending time with me, and I worry that he will resent me, or feel abandoned by the whole experience. I'm also afraid of my own lack of patience once the new baby arrives. I've mostly been doing ok with my own frustration and anger when he acts out... so far. But once I'm horribly sleep deprived and dealing with the challenges of a newborn, will I be able to check myself as easily? Will I become the shrewish mother I never wanted to be?

I think we'll be ok, for the most part. But he's such a special little human, and I really don't want to do anything that could dampen his spirit and enthusiasm.

So, as his birthday officially begins, I just hope that he knows how much everyone around him simply adores him. Happy Birthday Wu.