Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I saw something nasty in the woodshed.

After one of the best weekends on the books, we’ve got one shitty Tuesday happening here. First the good stuff:

Left work a touch early on Friday, cleaned my house with my BRAND NEW KICKASS VACUUM! Yes, I’m a nerd, and one of the best gifts I’ve ever received was the amazing vacuum my parents got me for my birthday this year. It was so amazing, I pretty much wanted to make out with the machine. It was that good.

Saturday began with a superb breakfast with Jen in Berkeley. Challah French Toast with blood-orange juice and BUCKETS of coffee makes for the best start to a day I can imagine. The weather was at least 75 degrees, and sunny as all hell. So, a little walking and shopping was necessary. After that, did a little household shopping with Sarah (who bought me BOOKS!!! Tons of BOOKS!), some bitchin’ lunch and movie watching.
After some light napping, we went GayBarring in the city.
A few highlights:

  • Xtian GRINDING with some totally hot gay boys
  • Riding the Muni, which almost never made it
  • Calling Sarah to remind her that her car/house keys are in the backpack, only to have her shout over the din, “Nicole, Just tell me the backpack is my friend!” Even better? After all that conversation, she got “locked out” because she in no way remembered that conversation.
  • While leaving the bar, Xtian kissed all the boys on the mouth at least once. Hurray for a husband who’ll kiss the gay boys!
  • Talking weddings with my favorite newly-engaged people: Becky and Tiffany.
  • MASSIVE Taco Bell consumption upon getting home in preparation for some super-hot drunken-doing-it, only to look over and see husband passed out cold on the couch, lettuce still in his beard. Hilarious!

The rest of the weekend was mostly movie-watching, barbecuing, drinking and relaxing in sunshiney goodness. Over the course of the weekend, I managed to increase my new book count to EIGHT! I may never leave my bed again.

Except that this morning marked the return to work, and the end of three day weekends for a while. Le sad.

Even nastier than a return to work after 6 consecutive three-day weekends? My little black kitty, Maggie, escaping the house and RUNNING FOR HER LIFE. She’s gone, we can’t find her. (And luring her with food would really only cause all the raccoons and street cats to take up permanent residence in my yard. Not cool)

My cats are not outside cats. They believe that all animals and humans are friendly, so they all walk directly up to any living thing and nuzzle and lick them. Which is fine when I bring that person/animal to the house. But there are 50 lb raccoons, mean-ass alley cats, mean crack-heads, dogs and let’s not even think about CARS, all waiting to hurt my tiny little girl.
I know, she’s annoying and escapes all the time, and meow’s as though her heart is breaking for hours at a stretch, and she’s been pissing on the floor to show her displeasure with Sarah taking over the cats’ room. But, she’s been with me through Milwaukee, made the trip out to California, survived my parents’ house; the roach infested hellhole of an apartment and now has everything a kitty could ask for. So, clearly, now is the time she decides to run away.

She escaped at 4:30 this morning, and was nowhere to be found when I went looking for her. We’d already discussed the need to make her live with her mistake, and make HER come back, rather than chasing her anymore. (She’s the lousiest hunter there ever was, and if we didn’t have food out for her, she would surely starve to death, so clearly, she’ll be back soon, right? RIGHT?!?) When Sarah left this morning, she saw Maggie in a neighbors fenced in yard, having the time of her life. Fucking cat. She’d better still be alive when we all get home today. So I can beat her with a stick. Or love her to death, either way.

Oh, and as if that’s not shitty enough, I started my period today and BLED through panties, pants, and onto my work chair. This happened at 10:30 am. If I had my druthers, I’d have left to clean myself up. But that’s not really very plausible, since I work 30 miles from home. Panties, in the trash, ruined. Pants now awkwardly stained after I made an attempt to fix them with my Tide pen (even though it specifically says it’s not very effective on blood), and wearing my coat all day while attempting to clean off my chair while no one is looking.

Now, if I can get into a car accident on the way home, *knock wood* or perhaps get a flesh-eating disease, that would be just great.

In conclusion: Weekend: all things good and right with the world.
Today: All things traumatic and inconvenient.

At least I’ve got some Gilmore Girls on TV tonight.

No comments: